Double the Pleasure, Double the Fun

You folks are in for a treat. I'm about to give you two posts in one. That's right, prepare to read a lot more than normal. Well, maybe not lately, with my verbosity reaching Mach 5 or so. Anyway, the reason for this is two pronged. First, I'm going to get intensely personal on you all, but do not think it's a negative post. It'll sound that way though. Second, I'm going to recount the strangeness of my day yesterday. Here goes:

Part 1, Finding Home

This morning, I had my first experience of not-knowing-where-the-hell-you-are-when-you-wake. I have to say, NKWTHYAWYW is pretty intense. At least it was for me. It began with a dream. At the beginning, I was at some orientation thing (completely different than the one I was actually just in) taking place at my high school. I also ran into my old boss from my old old job. He was sitting in the hot tub that was located on the playground (?!? What? I know). I then went to visit my old job, which was now relocated to some depression-era brick industrial type building. I was there to visit my old co-workers, but when I got there, an alarm sounded. When the alarm sounded, everyone stopped working and took turns shooting at a poster on the wall with either a b.b. gun or a bow and arrow. Intensely strange, I know.

I was supposed to meet my Mom and Nana and sister for Thanksgiving somewhere. The problem was that they just kept saying to meet them "here," so I never knew where to go. When I talked to Nana, she was talking to me while she was driving an RV...while laying down in a "bed driver's seat." Nana, you know better than to talk on the phone and lay down and drive simultaneously.

Eventually, it dawned on me that I would not be able to meet up with them, and in the dream, I was struggling to remember what I did last night and where I was. Pachelbel's Canon in D kicked in on the Super Ambiance Music Maker 3000 In The Sky Machine, and even though my gut reaction told me it was a cheesy choice, I still felt all sappy and stuff. It didn't help that some stereotypical looking French mime walked by and shouted, "Hi hi!" at me. It was at this point, at the emotional zenith of my dream, that I awoke due to the abnormally loud raindrops smacking against my roof. It's gotta be made of tin or something. Anyway, it took me a minute, an actual minute, to realize that I was in my apartment in Daegu. Where the hell did that French guy and that Gothic architecture come from? I was feeling Cruel Intentions-esque, I guess.

So. Part 2, Landlord's Day Out

Yesterday, when I was napping in my apartment, I hear my landlord coming in. "Hello, hello, Holcomb!" he says. He can't say "Steve" (it sounds more like Suhteebuh) so he just calls me Holcomb. He came in, and I quickly made him aware that my power was out. Of course he just goes right out and flicks a breaker that I somehow missed. He then changes my TV out for a bigger one and hooks up the cable. "Internet!" I say. "No, no internet. PC bang! I take you." Well, damn it. I want internet in my apartment. I don't know if he got that notion, but he looked like he was trying to plug the cable cord into my computer. "Modem," I say. Nothing. Anyway, I'll just ask my co-teacher tomorrow.

He then tells me, "We go eye shopping." I say to myself, why not? He runs upstairs to his apartment and gets changed. When he comes out, he looks like a brand new man, all spiffy in his suit. "Gentleman!" he yells. I laugh, because clearly he is outshining me. I haven't shaved in three days and look like a drunken hobo. He then takes my hand and holds it while we walk. Uncomfortable culture difference there. He leads me downtown and eventually we are in the heart of it all, lights and people. "Many many!" He says. I actually ran into two separate groups of teachers, both of which got a kick out of me walking around with my landlord.

We get to Burger King and it looks good to him, so we go inside. He grabs my arm and puts me up to the counter. "Fish. Number 10," I tell him. He points to the whopper. "Aniyo kugi (no meat)," I say to him, but he either doesn't understand my thick American accent or doesn't believe that vegetarians actually exist, and orders the meatiest thing I could see. I grab a table, lamenting what I am about to do, and eventually he sits down with the food. He prays (bely Chlistian, he reminds me) and we eat. I take a few bites of the whopper out of cultural etiquette and wolf down some fries. Eventually I say, "so full," and rub my belly. He then grabs a bag and puts the leftovers in it so that I can eat it later (or stealthily put it in the food trash). "Gonsa hamnida (thank you)," I say, and we're on our way again.

He takes me through two department stores and shows me around, and when we get to the food area where I had done some shopping previously, he buys me two hot dogs despite my protest. I put them in a bag and reiterated, "So full." We sit down for a coffee in that same area and get the barista to translate for us. He asks me questions about Korea and how I think it's wonderful and am in want of nothing due to his extreme generosity.

He leads me around a little more and eventually he shows me to the subway and we take it one stop home. I thank him again after he shows me where the English channel is on the TV and eventually we part.

This morning, he stopped by twice. First, about 20 minutes after I had woken up (still thinking of that dream and definitely in my pajamas) to take me to the PC bang. I declined because I clearly wasn't ready and it was raining and I didn't feel like going to a PC bang with him because it would be super awkward having him standing over my shoulder while I write about him. I know, he wouldn't understand the English, but still. We Americans like to talk about people when they are not around.

The second time he stopped by, he brought me an umbrella and a calendar and a TV remote that is shaped like a ball. His kindness is really outstanding (beellllly Chlistian), and I will have to buy him a gift soon, I think. I noticed that the calendar he gave me was a calendar he used from his church. Damn, Mr. Lee, I'm not used to this kind of generosity from strangers. Tomorrow he wants to take me to the market. I told him I have to start working tomorrow, but I don't know if he understood. I also told him I need internet in my apartment, and he said we'd take care of that tomorrow too. I wonder if he's just going to try to take me to a PC bang again.

Sorry for the brevity of this post. I'll try to flesh it out some time, because I know I didn't provide enough detail for you. Any ideas for gifts I could get Mr. Lee? Any ideas for gifts for my co-teacher?